“Yet maybe I needed to cross this many bridges to get to a state where even if there emerged other bridges I would want to traverse, I was finally satisfied with staying put, because I now know there’s no such thing as the single best, the single fairest life” (Talusan, 2021, p. 308)
For the final section of pages— coming towards the end of the book— Talusan reflects a lot on her journey to embracing herself without caring about anyone’s opinions. One thing that I’ve seen her do throughout the book is touch on the idea of “What if.” Starting from when Nanny Coro advised her to go to America instead of staying with her in her hometown because she might regret it later. Even though staying in the Philippines is what Talusan really wanted to do. All the “bridges” she crossed— as she likes to use as symbolism— made it hard for her to return to the way she was before. She says she could’ve “stayed in the Philippines and become a doctor,” or stay with Ralph as a man, and this would’ve been a happy life (Talusan, 2021, p. 307). However, when she chose her decision in these situations, it was hard to come back to this “could’ve” that didn’t become a reality. She ends the book by saying that no matter how difficult it was, it was necessary to cross these bridges— these obstacles, because now she “was finally satisfied with staying put” (Talusan, 2021, p. 308). She was finally at a place where she felt like she could stay, even if it’s not the fairest because there’s no such thing. The way the book ended inspired me to take a look at my life differently. I’m very similar to her where I fear being judged. But I’m not staying put in this uncomfortable position. I’m working on ignoring what other people think about me, and just do what I do without a care in the world. I shouldn’t have to mold myself in order to fit into the social norms just to satisfy others.
Citations
Gallagher, C. (2012). Bridge. [Image] Flickr. https://flic.kr/p/cfM4Dj.
Talusan, M. (2021). Fairest: A memoir. Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition
