I am able to put myself in someone’s shoes, but I can’t always think the way others do completely because I can’t live the life they went through. This statement feels very accurate after reading the first four chapters of Fairest. I was able to see how Talusan grew up and how different it is being someone living in the Philippines and having albinism. The part of her story that interested me the most were the topics of how society perceives looks.
The world comes with lots of expectations and stereotypes that judgement feels natural to us. There are many people that Talusan meets that judge their own appearance. An example is from page 2, where a fellow Harvard alum named Kit Clark said, “The men keep getting younger and I’m only getting uglier.” and “My life is here. I accept that I’m undesirable.” (Talusan, 2020). Talusan takes the time to compare him to the stereotype for a black gay man that is considered hot. While Talusan is the one that is doing this, I wouldn’t be surprised if Clark did the same thing to himself. He not only views himself as ugly, but he states that he accepts it. While I always hear stories of people called ugly returning looking like a Greek God, I rarely ever hear about people like Clark. I can relate to him and his insecurities. Instead of following the stereotypes, he chooses to be himself. However, the jabs at himself concerning his looks shows that deep down, it bothers him.
Another example of judgement is when Nanay Coro, her grandmother, said “This is because you are fair and beautiful…not dark and ugly like me.” (Talusan, 2020, pp. 24). Her grandmother implied that she is beautiful because she looked white while everyone else was dark. If she were here, she would be judged for having albinism. However, in her community, her being white brought an advantage. It is also interesting to hear everyone connect the words “dark” and “ugly”. No matter what, no one ever says they are dark and beautiful. This shapes Talusan to enjoy the attention, especially since she was treated as the “chosen one” to leave for the United States. This is significant because it shows how different societies view beauty, yet we always obsess over it or give up on trying.
Citations
CNN Philippines Staff (2021). ‘Fairest’ writer talks about transitions, ‘confusing experiences’ in memoir [Photograph]. CNN Philippines. https://www.cnnphilippines.com/lifestyle/2021/7/13/Meredith-Talusan-Hanson-memoir.html
Talusan, M. (2020). Fairest: A Memoir (pp. 1-82). Penguin Books.
This quote is definitely a strong sentence that stands out. The book does seem to shine light on that theme of how other people view beauty. People like Clark come to an acceptance that they’re ugly and they only get uglier. One main point you make is that Talusan compares him to a stereotype of black gay men being thought of as hot, which could possibly be what Clark thinks. I totally agree because that’s the effect of society. These definitions of beauty and ugly influences our perspective, and changes our self-esteem when we take it to heart. Because Talusan did this comparison, it is as if she’s being influenced by the country’s belief on beauty.
On the other hand, Talusan’s grandmother considers herself being ugly for being dark, unlike Talusan. It is unfortunate that that is the belief she basically grew up with in her community. I think there really shouldn’t be an exact image of what beauty and ugly means. These terms shouldn’t even exist because they are biased. Every country has their own definitions of these words. Why should one be gravely affected by these words that could mean many different things to other people? I know that with these terms, it can boost the confidence of other people like Talusan when she was a white child in her village and she gained positive attention, but is that really the only advantage of these words? When Nanay Coro says “you are fair and beautiful” to Talusan, does it sound similar to Clark’s acceptance of being ugly?