Everyone wants to be somebody special that everyone would like and want to be with. In reality, what makes people special depends on society and its biases. In these chapters of Fairest, Talusan struggles to accept travelling to America with her parents and siblings. She wanted to stay behind and live in the Philippines with her grandmother. Yet, her grandmother is the one to tell her she should go, which sent her down a path that not everyone can go down. While she is similar to other immigrants that travel to America for a chance at a better life, she found an advantage in her white skin.
Talusan was treated special and it shaped path. The first example would be Talusan’s grandmother, when Talusan writes “…who may have loved me regardless but favored me over everyone else because she connected my color to the wealthy, powerful Americans who had conquered our land.” (Talusan, 2020, pp. 91). Anyone would assume that her grandmother’s favoritism was just the matter of her love for Talusan. It is true she loves Talusan, however, she always brought up her skin being fair and beautiful. Her grandmother had believed that the ability to be perceived as white gave her the edge over everyone else. She thought one of the reasons Talusan will prosper is her skin. Her grandmother favored her, told her she’s special, and encouraged her to pursue a life in the U.S. It’s sad to even think that being white was a reason for it. It’s sadder that her grandmother wasn’t entirely wrong. She was seen as white and it helped her avoid discrimination against Asians.
Being treated special shaped Talusan’s decisions. Being praised for her whiteness made her try to be seen as white to everyone. She sometimes seems to forget that she isn’t white, such as when she was at a party and she said to herself “At least I’m not Asian.” (Talusan, 2020, pp. 120). She worked on her accent, her story, and even her clothes and hair to match other white people. She made sure that what her family said (that she would be seen as white) became a reality. It almost seems like she abandoned her old poorer self to be with the rich white Harvard students. This is significant because race has always been controversial and if being white means you’re special, would that make the rest of us not?
Moody, J. (2021). In fall 2019, 82% of accepted students enrolled at Harvard University in Massachusetts [Photograph]. U.S.News. https://www.usnews.com/education/best-colleges/articles/universities-colleges-where-students-are-eager-to-enroll
Talusan, M. (2020). Fairest: A Memoir (pp. 83-149). Penguin Books.
Talusan had no one else but her grandmother to find comfort in. She trusted her a lot which is also what gave her the courage to take Coro’s advice and move to America even though she really didn’t want to. Because Talusan grew up being special and sometimes flattered for her white skin, she wanted that attention— that feeling of being someone special again in America. However at the same time, she also doesn’t want to negatively stand out. She doesn’t want to be discriminated against and judged. She begins to accept her white skin and use it as an advantage in order to fit in. She starts becoming more distant and distant from her family, as if symbolizing that she’s leaving her culture and past self in order to become this white person who came from California.
It is a huge contrast when before coming to America, Talusan stated she did not want anything to do with Americans— the race that had taken advantage of her people according to the history books she’s read. She didn’t want to be a traitor, yet now she’s forgotten this and has been trying to blend in with the Americans. At the beginning of the book, as a child Talusan didn’t like to feel different, so I can understand why she’s trying to blend in as a white person. I relate to her fear of being judged, no one in this world wants to go through that, however, there are times when you have to open up and forget about everyone else’s opinions. But, I feel that because of the people around her as a kid, she’s been repeatedly told that she’s basically lucky to have white skin, and now she’s starting to accept that. Do you think Nanay Coro did the right thing in pointing out the advantage of having beautiful white skin? Coro might not have meant to do this on purpose, but is it right to tell a child that what makes others jealous is just because of their white skin? Should a child really grow up thinking they’re only special mainly because of their skin color? Couldn’t she have pointed out something else? Do you think the grandmother might’ve felt some sort of regret after advising Talusan to leave for America?