Following the recent resurgence of social justice movements for people of color, I’ve come to a realization that I had never read a memoir of the black experience in America before. Many of what I know was broadly from the textbook, news, or interviews. I was motivated to hear an authentic narrative of the experience of an African American in America because it is important to learn and understand the lives of the minority. Hence, I choose to read Heavy in order to know more about the author Kiese Laymon’s struggle in the context of being African American in America.
Upon looking at the book cover, I was drawn to the way the title of the book was displayed. The title was only one word, but it carried a lot of weight. This was demonstrated visually by the fact that the title took up the majority of the space, leaving the name of the author and awards he won to the side. It is almost as if the author does not want us to focus on himself or the awards he won but on the narrative of the author. The singular title, Heavy, connotated that Laymon, like many in his community, carried something huge on his shoulder that was overbearing. This sense of burden immediately reminds me of my family. As a first-generation immigrant family, we also kept a lot of our struggles to ourselves and rarely share them with others. We wanted to relieve this burden but it was difficult to do so. Thus, I was curious how did Laymon find the courage and willpower to relieve his burdens by revealing his secrets?
In a book review done by Jennifer Key, Key praised Laymon’s authenticity and honesty. Laymon’s narrative differs from certain biographies where the authors sugarcoat their struggles and attain peace through hard work. He is also uninterested in writing about a false sense of improvement in the lives of African Americans and improvement in equality in America. Instead, Laymon opens up his deeply hidden secrets, such as his eating disorder and exercise addiction. Although readers might not have similar conditions as he did, Laymon’s act of burying his secrets is universal to everyone. His honesty throughout the book is uncomfortable to hear, but Key explains that it is necessary to hear this authenticity to move on from our dark past, as well as America’s dark past. For instance, Key is candor about his mother who although had good intentions of protecting him was only hurting him instead. When asked by the audience if Laymon likes his mother in a reading done by Politics and Prose, he responded, “… I do not like the fact that sometimes my mom beat and abuse me under the auspice of trying to stop me from getting beaten and abused by white people… I do like my mom but like every child in this nation, some days I don’t like some of the things my mama has done to herself or to me.” Laymon also does not shy away from the fact that he was also guilty of following his mother’s footsteps in his romantic relationship, even though he abused in a different way. I really appreciated that Laymon was extremely honest in his memoir. He recognized and vocalized the flaws of people he loved and himself. Yet, he still loved them and worked to reconcile those flaws.
Work cited
Key, Jennifer. “Heavy by Kiese Laymon (review).” Prairie schooner 93.2 (2019): 189–190. Web.
Laymon, K. [Politics and Prose]. (2018, December 18). Kiese Laymon, “Heavy: An American
Memoir” [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fw2k_60xb-c&t=253s
